Another Special Life in Christ
These testimony lives are not stories of "role models". Jesus is the
role model!
These are lives wonderfully touched & changed by Jesus!
Beth
Robles:
I first heard of Beth at our hospital's weekly
breast cancer conference. Then the following e-mail was shared with
me:
"Dear Marie: Your words are so encouraging. Thank
you so much for the verses. I have felt the Lord's presence so much these past days.
Sometimes I feel I have more peace and am getting more sleep than those who are worrying
about me!
You are so right about God using this. I have felt
such peace that this trial has been carefully filtered through the Almighty's hands and will
be used for His glory. Also, all things work together for the good of those in Christ
Jesus, so I believe He has some goodies in there for the rest of us as well! Isn't it amazing
He really does allow us to be able to rejoice in our trials! I know this doesn't mean it will
be easy to go through in the
flesh.
I do have times that I grieve, not only the
uncertainties of the cancer, but the changes. Weaning my baby was so hard emotionally. I felt
I was severing a special bond and that Daniel felt I was rejecting him. Altering my body
physically with the mastectomy and hormonally to go through menopause is something I don't
feel like I've been able to comprehend yet. I don't know that we would have had anymore
children, but to think I will no longer have a choice, that there will be no more little ones
to hold and nurse, is a difficult closure to such a special time in my
life.
This all seems so insignificant when I remember
what those closures are there to prevent. But I feel like I need to grieve to be able to move
on. I know the Lord will walk me through whatever He's planned for me. I've been reflecting
on your words of how Daniel will be such a comfort through all this. As I'm going through
these closures, I do have a little one to hold and enjoy to ease the
pain.
My bone scan and CT scan came back good! Now we
are waiting on the PET scan. We meet with Dr. Lambert-Falls on Tuesday. They're recommending
surgery as soon as possible.
Marie, I know this sounds like an odd request, and
I especially want you to know this is not because Joe and I are in denial, we're fully aware
of what most likely lies ahead, but before surgery, we feel we need to check my breast again
with another mammogram. We have had the elders and many others pray over us and have asked
the Lord for a miraculous healing for His glory. We feel, to demonstrate faith before the
Lord in those prayers, we need to do this final test before we go to surgery in case He has
decided to work in this way. We know He may chose to heal through conventional medical means
or, ultimately, when I'm made perfect standing before Him one day, but Joe has felt it's
Biblical, as it states in James, to start with prayer for
restoration.
I can't tell you what you're prayers have meant to
me. You know, the day we were told they thought the cancer was probably invasive, every
medical person we had contact with that day was a Christian and prayed for us, down to the
lady who took my blood samples! The Lord was right there with
me.
Well, I'd better get some sleep. Again, thank you
for your prayers and so much
encouragement.
Leaning hard on
Him,
Beth"
Beth had her surgery, and sent me the
following write-up; and we met in my office a few days ago to further discuss her
situation.
"Dearest family and
friends,
I don't know how to begin, but to praise our
awesome God! I've been home since 4:00 this afternoon, and several hours ago we found this
wonderful news from our pathologist awaiting us on our
e-mail!
"Dear Beth: Have not had time to call docs...just
finished your case. Margins clear; all CIS and no invasion; lymph node was negative. Have a
great weekend and I hope that your postop recovery is tolerable. I'm so glad to pass on this
good news...I'd have lost money were I a betting person. Ervin Shaw,
MD"
We are praising God! We are so thankful for all of
you who have prayed and fasted with us and for us. This is quite a journey for us that's not
over yet and I can't wait to share individually with you. I know I need to get rest tonight,
but I just want to let you celebrate with us and to praise our Father in Heaven. But I'm so
excited that I at least have to sum up the last couple of
days...
Three days ago, at the start of Succoth, our
family had originally planned on camping under the stars in remembrance of how the God of
Abraham, Isaac and Jacob tabernacled or dwelled among His people, the Israelites, in
the desert.
But there was no camping. Joe was holding my hand
and driving me to the hospital for a mastectomy. God had different plans for our family this
year and this time He would have us tabernacle with Him in deeper ways than we'd
imagine.
Four days before going to the hospital, He gave me
a vision of comfort, and confirmed it three times. In the midst of all the pain and fear of
cancer, impending surgery, etc, I saw myself as a little child being held by her Daddy in a
terrible storm at night. He was so big and strong and I was being held close to His chest,
under his coat and I could barely see out at the horrific storm and immense danger outside as
we walked, but I knew I was completely safe, that the storm could not reach
me.
Three days before surgery, as a dear friend held
my hand and prayed for me, she prayed I'd be enveloped in God's arms and under His
protection.
The day before the surgery, a stranger called me.
She'd had cancer, mastectomy, chemotherapy and radiation. She'd heard of me through a friend
of a friend and shared a verse she said had comforted her that was in Psalms, "He will cover
you with his feathers and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your
shield and rampart. You will not fear the terror of the
night."
The day of the surgery, Joe and I sat in the
waiting room before my sentinel node mapping and Psalms 91:6 kept coming into my mind. I had
no idea what this verse could be and had my Bible with me, so looked it up. I opened up to it
and it was part of a list of things not to fear, "the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,
and the plague that destroys at midday." For me, that was cancer. I decided to read the whole
Psalm and it was the actual Psalm containing the verse of how He will cover us with His wings
and protect us from the deadly
pestilence!
One more beautiful thing to share. Then I'll go to
bed. Promise!
Joe has been praying before all this began for
increased faith, that God would take away his unbelief. Two days before I found out I had
cancer, I woke up 4:30 one morning and couldn't sleep. I think this was God, because, believe
me, sleep had not been a problem for me for months and getting up early to pray was distant
in my past! But this morning it seemed I had no choice and I felt I was supposed to pray. One
of three things I felt I was to pray for was Joe's faith to be
increased.
Then we found out about the cancer. From the
start, Joe felt he should pray for healing, miraculous without medical intervention. But if
not, that God would move through the hands of the doctors. He had such faith. We went before
the congregation for the elders to pray over me. We told doctors we wanted a second mammogram
to see if God had decided to remove the cancer, but it was still
there.
So, last night, my second night in the hospital,
I'd talked Joe into going home so he could get better rest. I said I was okay. Well, being
alone after all this, I wasn't quite as strong as I thought and I shed a few
tears.
One of the things I poured out my heart to God
over was how Joe had, so full of child-like faith and trust, prayed fervently for a
miraculous healing. One morning, after it looked like the surgery was indeed imminent, Joe
said that maybe we were wrongly thinking that a miracle would bring God the most glory, when
in fact He might get the most glory from us going straight through this difficult trial
trusting in Him.
But still, just in case, he prayed for the
miracle...
The morning of the surgery, he knelt by the bed
and cried out to God, praying that He'd take this away from me. In the waiting room before my
surgery, he was still praying for that miracle. All I can say is that my faith on that level
paled in comparison. It had paled after we went for the second mammogram which came back
unchanged. I was so proud of Joe's
faith.
So...I cried last night. The surgery was over, my
breast was gone, and the uncertainty of cancer still loomed in the future. I felt a peace God
was sovereign, but I hurt not understanding how he would bless Joe's incredible faith. I knew
He would, but I hurt so much for Joe because I didn't know how God was going to do it. I
remembered as we left for the hospital how he told everyone he was taking his bride to
surgery. I envisioned a little child holding his sick little lamb before God and pleading to
God for healing, then carrying the lamb away,
unhealed.
Then, tonight we received this incredible e-mail
from the pathologist. The cancer had not spread out of the ducts! The first time I'd
personally talked to him was the day before the surgery when he called to give us MD
Anderson's (one of the top breast cancer centers in the U.S. located in Houston) second
opinion on my case. He said that he'd practiced for over 30 years and when he saw cases like
mine there was at least some invasion of the cancer in the rest of the breast
tissue.
This is becoming much too long, so I won't mention
examples, but I did get many confirmations that God was pleased that we had prayed for a
miraculous healing. And the oncologist, who said she had a "panicky" feeling about my case,
ordered a CT scan, bone scan and PET scan, and said she was quite surprised the tests came
back clear, was a testimony to some possible preliminary
healing.
As Joe, his Mom, my children and I held hands
tonight on the floor of our living room and prayed a prayer of thankfulness to our God, I
wondered about faith. God seemed to have taken away the invasiveness. But I still had to go
through surgery.
God reminded me of Abraham taking Isaac to be
sacrificed. It seems such a mystery. Was that for God's benefit to test Abraham? Or was it
for Abraham? What faith he had to have as he woke up that morning, gathered the sticks,
walked up the mountain, laid Isaac on the wood, held up the knife, all the while wondering
how God was going to do it. God was not being cruel in waiting even though He could have
stopped the process at any point.
I probably would have ended it all with Abraham
walking up the mountain with Isaac! And I would have ended this cancer journey with the first
fervent prayer for a miracle. But each step we take, like Abraham going step by step up that
mountain, or a little child learning to walk, quite unsteadily, towards his father
until he falls into his arms, causes our faith to grow
stronger.
Joe and I keep saying that although this is so
unpleasant to go through in the "flesh," we would never want to go back because of how close
we've grown to God and to each
other.
Please continue to pray for us. This note from the
pathologist, and the fact that he would be so excited for us that he would informally e-mail
us with this news before even telling the other doctors, still seems surreal to us. But if
this is the way it seems to be, we may be nearing the end of the "cancer" part of this
journey. I may not need chemotherapy or
radiation.
Thank you for standing with us through this
journey. We are so overwhelmed by the love, prayers, service, and encouragement from all of
you.
Joy in
Him,
Beth"
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(posted 12 November 2005)
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You have just read a very brief example of the
powerful, supernatural transformation of a person's life which is possible through the
acceptance of Jesus as your savior. Are you tired of life as it now is for you? He will
accept you just as you are right this second! Consider accepting Jesus now
[check it
out]!
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